As far as I can tell, there’s pretty much only one reason anybody should ever use public transport as part of their daily commute. Sure, there’s arguments for the beneficial impact on the environment if everyone stuck to trains and buses to get around, sure there’s the financial element, but really? There’s only one reason to make it a habit.
Not just listening in, oh no, the best thing about other people is that they are invariably staring at their phones throughout their journey. It isn’t easy, but catching a glimpse of someone’s text conversation can be as tantalizing as it is intriguing. If you’re lucky, you might get sight of someone having an argument with their other half or, even better, a break up! What? Stop looking at me like that, will you?
I admit all of this because right now there is an App at number 5 on Apple Store’s Free Top Chart is a wonderful looking app by the name of ‘HOOKED – Chat Stories’. The description promises that HOOKED provides creepy, funny or real life stories in the form of text messages going back and forth between two or more people.
That’s right, all the joy of watching somebody’s phone over their shoulder without ever needing to leave the house. Naturally, I jumped at the opportunity. As soon as I downloaded the app, I was in. No preamble, no loading screens, just straight into a story. Fantastic! The story the app launched me into was between ‘Tiffany’ and her ‘Mom’, and clearly fell into the creepy category. Tiffany could hear a baby crying in the basement, with her Mom defensively telling her to stay in her room and wait until it stopped.
With each tap of the on-screen button, a new text message would appear. My taps got quicker as the story progressed, I wanted to know more – I wanted to unravel the mystery! Then, as suddenly as the app began I received the message: “Oh no! You’ve run out of hoots. Your hoots will recharge in: 30:58”. WHAT? I barely got halfway through the story and I was being cock-blocked by an owl in a cape and a crying emoji.
A large blue banner at the bottom of the screen told me I could ’Speed Up Time’, so naturally I followed by instincts and was met with the chance to ‘Become a Superhoot’ and choose an option between paying £2.29 a week, £5.99 a month or £29.99 for the year.
Well I’m sorry, Mr Owl. I don’t care how quick, stylish and well-designed your app is, if you can’t even get through a single story without asking for a tip then you’re not the bird for me. That said, I am a little curious about the function to write your own story. It’s just a shame I still have to wait TWENTY MINUTES TO GET TO IT.